Hillary Clinton Jokes and Puns

Why does Hillary want to have sex with Bill Clinton first thing in the morning?
She wants to be the first lady.

“Chelsea Clinton gave birth to a daughter named Charlotte this weekend. Hillary Clinton was really excited until she remembered that you have to be 18 to vote.

What movie does Hillary watch when she’s in a bad mood? Kill Bill.

Why should conservatives vote for Hillary? Because a woman’s place is in the (White) House.

Who are cats going to vote for in November? Hillary Kitten.

Have you heard about the new app Hillary Clinton is working on?
It’s called “Pokemon Go To The Polls”.

“I saw that Hillary Clinton visited the headquarters of Twitter and Facebook yesterday. Hillary would also have visited LinkedIn, but she already knows what job she wants.”

Presidential Power Bill and Hillary were going down a back road and stopped at a gas station. As the worker was filling up their car, he said to Hillary “I went to high school with you”. She recognized him and agreed with him. Later as they were driving down the road Bill said “If you had married him you wouldn’t be married to the President”. Hillary said “Oh yes I would–he would be President.”

Why is Hillary Clinton running for President?
Because it’s easier than running from Law Enforcement.

Would the Clintons ever vote for Trump?
Not even if they were Hill-Billys.

Why shouldn’t Republicans worry about losing in 2016?
Apparently depression is covered by Obamacare.

What was Hillary Clinton’s last gift to Monica?
Spot remover.