Graduation Jokes and Puns

How many University Graduates does it take to change a light bulb? One, but it may take up to seven years!

When I graduated from high school, I was so poor and couldn’t afford college. So my parents sent me to dog training school. I learned a lot when I was there. Sit, stay, roll over. I haven’t quite got the fetching part down. They say I’m a little rough around the edges.

My son just graduated from college. My friends asked me what he majored in. I told them he was studying to be an astronaut: he took up space.

After twelve years of carrying books to school, you’re well prepared for a career in backpacking.

Graduation: where you trade the agony of writing term papers for the agony of writing resumes.

It’s tough out there, but if you take your education and apply yourselves, you will eventually succeed in finding…..an unpaid internship!

After Graduating from High School, David moves away from home to study at University. One of his letters home reads:
Dear Father,
University i$ really great. I am making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying very hard. With all my $tuff, I $imply ¢an’t think of anything I need, $o if you would like, you can ju$t $end me a card, a$ I would love to hear from you.
Love,
Your $on.
After receiving his son’s letter, the father immediately replies by sending a letter back.
Dear David,
I kNOw that astroNOmy, ecoNOmics, and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep even an hoNOr student busy. Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge is a NOble task, and you can never study eNOugh.
Love,
Dad 

What did the M&M want to graduate college?… Because he wanted to be a Smarty.

Knock Knock Who’s there! B-4! B-4 who? B-4 you take the diploma, shake the dean’s hand.

What do you get when you complete science class? A graduated cylinder.

When I graduated from high school, I was so poor and couldn’t afford college. So my parents sent me to dog training school. I learned a lot when I was there. Sit, stay, roll over. I haven’t quite got the fetching part down. They say I’m a little rough around the edges.

I’ll be honest. I did not graduate at the top of my class. In fact, I was so close to the bottom, my sheepskin had a tail.