Dracula Jokes and Puns

Why did Dracula go to the dentist?
To remove some guys neck that was stuck in his fangs.

What did the vampire call his wife?
Bloody Mary!

What does Dracula say to the mirror?
Terror, terror on the wall! Who has the best bite of them all?

What happened to the two mad vampires?
They both went a little batty.

What is Dracula’s favorite sports drink?
Readyneck!

Why did Dracula never marry?
He always wanted to become a bat-chelor!

What type of coffee does a vampire order when at a coffee shop?
A de-coffiin-ated coffee!

Q: What did Dracula say about meeting his girlfriend?
A: It was love at first bite!

How do vampire footballers get the mud off?
They all get in the bat-tub.

Why does Dracula have no friends?
Because he’s a pain in the butt.

What did the vampire do to stop his son biting his nails?
He cut all his fingers off.

What’s a vampire’s favorite sport?
Batminton.