Bird Jokes and Puns

What do you get if you cross a parrot with a woodpecker?
A bird that talks in morse code!

Two redneck duck hunters out on the marsh duck hunting.
One says to the other, “we’re not having much luck today getting any ducks.”
The other one says, “maybe we’re not throwing the dog high enough.”

What’s a good winter holiday tip?
Never catch snowflakes with your tongue until all the birds have gone south for the winter.

What do you get if you cross a parrot with a shark?
A bird that will talk your ear off!

Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?
Because he was caught tweeting on a test.

Why is a sofa like a roast chicken?
Because they’re both full of stuffing!

What do you call a duck on drugs?
A quackhead.

Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the bay, they’d be baygulls!

Why does a stork stand on one leg?
Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.

A duck walks into a drug store and buys a chapstick.
The clerk says, “Will that be cash or charge?” The duck says, “Just put it on my bill!

What do you get when you cross a Golden Eagle with a razor?
A Bald Eagle!